…our venomous SUVs

Idon’t customarily write obituaries, but when there’s been a death close to home, it’s appropriate that you and I pay our last respects. I hate to be the harbinger of such news, but the bicycle is dead.

What a shame, valiant mechanical wonder – we hardly knew ye. Which is so sad on account of today’s price of gas, our entirely clogged roadways and our obscene waistlines.

Admittedly, we’ve had our “biking” moments, a decade here or there when a good number of us rode bicycles, but it was just our sporadic foray into the use of the metallic stallion. Those ingenious transportation days are gone, much like the bicycle itself. We’ve become incredibly lazy and immensely fat, and our time is excruciatingly limited because we’re rushing around trying to finance our bloated lifestyles.

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